Trying to get somewhere
We always believe in hardwork. Or rather that is what we have been told. Work with an end in sight. I am noticing that this approach to life is getting spilled over to our spiritual life as well. I have seen myself trying to get somewhere in the spiritual life. However I am realizing that, you can't get any where in spiritual life, because the goal of spiritual life is the end of yourself. So how can you have a spiritual life.
I have been trying to meditate. Using mantra in the sahaj samadhi meditation. Using mantra I was trying to get deeper into the meditation. Yesterday when I was trying to meditate, there was this question - Who is that trying to meditate? I am trying to meditate. Whenver there is effort, the effort comes from the person. And that means there is separation. Goal of the meditation is to end the separation. So just be, and drop everything else. For that matter, we dont have anything to drop. Just realizing that we dont have anything to drop, we get into meditation.
I started writing this blog. But, now-a-days I dont feel like even writing. Who is writing and what is there to write? Words and sentences are outside of me.
I have been trying to meditate. Using mantra in the sahaj samadhi meditation. Using mantra I was trying to get deeper into the meditation. Yesterday when I was trying to meditate, there was this question - Who is that trying to meditate? I am trying to meditate. Whenver there is effort, the effort comes from the person. And that means there is separation. Goal of the meditation is to end the separation. So just be, and drop everything else. For that matter, we dont have anything to drop. Just realizing that we dont have anything to drop, we get into meditation.
I started writing this blog. But, now-a-days I dont feel like even writing. Who is writing and what is there to write? Words and sentences are outside of me.
Comments
Your words are becoming deeper and deeper ..more like Guruji's words now. Tell me how does this impact your work life? What you said is true...when you "try" to meditate you wouldnt be able to "completely" meditate. The state of "trying", whenever it goes, you will be meditating.
When one dare to contemplate on who I am, then he finds out that there is nothing he can point to. What is the answer to the question "Who am I?". The answer is complete silence.
Now, seeing things as they are, there is an acceptance of the situation. Remember the basic course teachings. Accept people and situations as they are. When you have the understanding that you are neither X nor Y, then the acceptance happens. Because you have no choice.
So two things happens to your daily life after that.
1. You may still have your vasanas and mental impressions that keep on playing in your mind. However you know that the mind exist in the awareness. The mind itself does not have a separate existence. It is like pictures coming on a screen. You see them happening. Past mental impressions, unless they are totally cleared, will create some response in your mind. However you immediately see the response and will understand that you are not the response. At that point the response drops and an acceptance of the situation comes in.
How does it affect my work life? As guruji said - one of three things can exist at a time. They are desires, action, self awareness. When one happens, the other two disappears. So at work, you work like any one else. But, there is a much more acceptance of what is happening. There is no "me" trying to improve or get ahead. Some desires arise, but when they arise, you know that you are not the desires and they drop faster than they arise. Also, less and less desires will stick to you.
Keep doing Kriya and meditation as they erase old vasans. So when you erase your old vasans and see the truth, which is very simple, then you know that the show is run by someone. You are not the author of your life story. You are just the witness. When you get that, the effort to change, improve etc drops. And then life happens..beyond that I dont know. There is God and Guruji, who know it very well and who runs the show!!
Jai Gurudev
Gan enna bhavam athu thonaika venamika thonnunnathakil akilam ganithenna vazhi thonnename varada narayanaya nama. So you can go the other way and increase our ego into all encompassing one. That can be done in steps.If first
I can include family
Then I can include known people
Then I can become full mankind
Then I can become the earth
Then I can become the universe
Then I am god
All the opinions and paths leads to one. As long as we understand that, it does not matter what way we look at things.
Also, ask the question - the inclusive feeling - Where does it come from? whom does it come to? The funny thing is that when we try to do in steps, we never get out of the first step!!!
Love